My next vacation: sheepherding on the tiny island of Mypos

Does it get any better than Balki Bartokomous and Cousin Larry Appleton? Not bloomin' likely! Word around town is that Balki will be back this fall on The Surreal Life. To quote the Balkster: "Now I am so happy, I do the dance of Joy!" To see if reading the episodes is as fun as watching, meander here for episode summaries: http://www.tv.com/perfect-strangers/show/1034/episode_guide.html

Go back to Sweden!

IKEA, you are my new nemesis. You are not the wind beneath my wings. This photo shows the 2nd kitchen table that I have put together in the last month, as the first one only had 2 legs that fit onto the table. Much confusion ensued when I tried to return the legs, because the table model had changed. They tried to give me 2 legs that were totally different. In the end, I had to cart out a whole new table and start over. What the deuce is to be done with the half-finished first table? (Did somebody say firewood?)

At least Stacy made me birthday cake #2, another delightful foray into frosting and baking.

@#$%^&!

Total Weekly mileage: 108 miles. Hopefully the high mileage lately has increased my aerobic capacity. On the horizon: get faster, better.
Sun 7.24.05
1 hour 50.3 min, 18 miles up on the Rail Trail North of Baltimore (average of about 6:07/mile). A stupendous run, and a controlled effort. Though warm, humidity seems to have plummetted. At 9 miles, I was at 57 min, and I negative split 53 min for the last 9 miles. Kept an eye on my watch the last 7 or so miles which were in this neighborhood: (5:57, 5:59, 5:54, 5:52, 5:47, 5:44, 5:44).

Now I must turn to face the waning weekend-- will I work today, nap, or entertain myself otherwise? Or perhaps, push the boundaries of 3 dimensional human existence by doing all 3?

Sat. 7.23.05
1 hour 35 minutes, 13 miles. Headed south of Charm City to Patapsco State Park, where a plethora of trails awaited (150+miles). I parked by the Cascade Falls trail, and galloped through this area. There are webs of trails that intersect with each other, so it was a bit of a challenge to find my way back out. I ended up running about 30min longer than I wanted to, because the trail that took me to my car disappeared. It was like at Harry Potter's Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, when cooridors just happen to vanish or hide once in a while. Well, I really slowed the pace dramatically when over time, even as my shorts chafed my groin like a cheese-grater. Finally, I found my way out, and passed a little waterfall. I kicked off my shoes and hopped in the swimmin' hole, which felt gorgeously *cood (*cood=combination of cool and good).

Later that day, I wrestled with Stacy's kitchen table from IKEA. After a few hours, a few IKEA-inspired curses, and a few blisters, the lumbered beast was finally assembled. As of Sunday morning, it was still standing up.

Fry 7.22.05
AM: 56 min, about 8 miles. Ran befo' work, here there, and about. I probably sweated enough in this humidity to fill up a toilet.
PM: 51min, about 7 miles slow, around the mean city streets. Ugh, there was a festival, or ganster convention or something in the area, and the streets were too crowded for any meaningful running. I also slipped into a rather dubious section of West Baltimore, which was just no good at all. Something about large groups of people sitting on corners/steps/etc., with nothing else to do makes me nervous. Plus, the guys on motorcycles who kept going by me doing wheelies. And the abundance of coppers cruising about.

Rock the Casbah

A new age has dawned for Baird's Blog. Here is one of my first photos fresh off the camera. I am indicating a message on my shirt for you. How brilliant.

Today's running news:
AM: 5 miles, 35.5 min easy. Round yonder park 4 times.
PM: Got in my vehicle and hauled it on up to Wissahickon Park/The Green/Fairmount Park/Forbidden Drive/Whateveryouwannacallit. 3 mile warm up, around 21 min. 4 mile tempo in 21:51, which is about 5:28 pace. 3 mile cool down, around 21 min. Another scorcher of a day. I think Mother nature left the oven on, or accidently bumped her thermostat. I was wobbly on the cooldown, but explored a trail off to the side of the main drag, which involved a very steep
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This just in: I finished a whole box of Oreos in 4 days. That's 140 calories X 14 servings= 1960 calories, which is enough to fuel a mortal man for one standard earth day. Luckily I am not your run-of-the-mill homo sapien! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, Ha! Ha ha ha ha ah aha ha ah. Ha.... hmmm... chuckle. cough cough. riight.

Baird's Blob

On Saturday, I attended the 6th annual BlobFest. There was a band, movie paraphernalia, and of course, multiple movie screenings. This event was an entertaining jaunt into a now-campy film. Most in attendance were entertained and humored, not terrified. Stacy, on the other hand... let's just say she won't be mellow with Jello any time soon.

Twenty-Fo

Gotta keep this quick, muggles, as there's a Harry Potter book beckoning me.
W 7.20.05 It's my birfday. 2 dozen years. I rule.
AM: 35 min-- 5 miles, looped around park. Picked it up towards end. Still humid.
PM: 82 min-- about 12 miles. Felt good, ran around Willows Park. Quite hot, a little less humid at least.
T 7.19.05
AM: 42 min-- 6 miles, around park, etc. I saw a mama deer and 4 bambis in my back yard today. I tried to rush the venison, but to no avail.
PM: 55 min= 9 miles-- did a little fartlek (thrice by 3 on, 1.5-2 off, 2 on, 1 off, 1 on, 1 off). Paces when "on" were 5-5:20ish probably. Sooo hot, heat index near 100. I practically melted.
M 7.18.05
AM: 35 min-- 5 miles.
PM: 68 min-- 10 miles--around Bryn Mawr grad college, etc. Did 8 X 100 m strides at Agnes.
Apprx Weekly Mileage 7.11.05-7.17.05= 101 miles. Not shabby for a blazing hot and humid week. Have to start adding more workouts. I have been doing strides here and there, and doing some upper body. My hip flexor has been sore, and I have been limited in ab work/pilates that I can do. Achilles is improving--self massage and a little icing seems to be doing the trick.
S 7.17.05 1 hr 44.5 min-- Ran trails at Warwick County Park, which were a bit soggy, but nice. One of the stream crossings was flooded out, so I readjusted. Quite humid and warm. A solid, though rugged run on real trails. At one point, saw a deer foot in the road. No leg, no body, just a foot. I thought about grabbing it for good luck, but that might only work for rabbits. For 2nd day in a row, people asked me directions. Surprisingly, I was able to point them in the right direction (for a dog show! dog show!). About 16 miles today.
S 7.16.05 66 min-- Ran 10 miles out on some totally rock and roll trails. I saw a mother, offspring, and hound swimming in a spot where I picked up a leech 2 years ago just standing ankle-deep in the water for some fishing. They were having a good time, and I didn't have the heart to be a party defecator. To combat the biting flies, I applied vinegar all over myself, and though I stunk like a skunk, I was free from flies. Also got in a good lift. Following my run, we went to the Blob Fest in Phoenixville. This is the town where the legendary 1950's horror classic was spawned. My parents, Stacy, and I viewed the movie in the classic Colonial Theater, which is featured in the movie. This was in part a nerd convention, but geek is truly sheik these days (see Napoleon Dynamite, et al.). The man behind me in the theater had no internal monologue... gee, I was so impressed that he knew what was coming up every scene. All in all, twas a nice outing. Partied like it was my birfday that night-- the highlighted gift was a picture perfect knew digital camera. Now I can add copious pictures of meself to zee blog. Stacy did valiantly in getting me the first 5 seasons of Simpsons on DVD.

F 7.15.05
AM: 55.5 min- 8.5 miles Ran Radnor trail, got going at decent pace for early in the am.
PM: 38 min-- 5.5 miles Got out for a quickie at home while parents dined. Caught some of a rainshower which was refreshing.
T 7.14.05
AM: 35.5- 5 miles.
PM: 77--11+ miles around Willows park. I saw a frog. I was stopped and declared: "You're the man now, frog." He fell off the log.
W 7.13.05
AM: 35min, 5 miles.
PM: 21 22 28. A wee bit o' tempo running, around 5:30 pace. 11 miles. Ran up at Valley Green in Fairmount Park. Not too far of a drive from work, and a glorious location to train (shaded, soft, mileage markers). Sadly, today was ultra hot, and I had to keep the tempo short. I was seeing stars and feeling lightheaded on the cooldown. Runner's high? Probably more like heat exhaustion.
T 7.12.05
AM: 57 min. 8ish miles-- Bryn Mawr grad school?
PM: 49 min 7ish miles.
M 7.11.05
1 hr-- Ran somewhere? 9 miles, maybe Radnor trail
35 - 5mile
Apprx Weekly Mileage 7.4.05-7.10.05= 96 miles.

I was saddened to hear of the bombings on the London transport system. Here is me riding the tube back in April. No doubt those saucy Brits will bounce right back. I don't think that the "terror" should really be incapacitating. To put it in perspective: there averaged about 9 fatalities of all types on Britan's roads per day in 2001. The likelihood of being caught in a terrorist attack is slim, lower than about any other way to go. Still, it causes a sensation, and brings the fear home and to heart--an attack on America could be inevitable. In the future, when trains and buses have airline-esque security, we all may look back at these days with sad wonder. We want security, but do we want Orwellian Big Brother? Discuss amongst yourselves...

I said hey. What's going on?

Sunnyday, 7.10.05
1 hour 45 min 21 seconds; 17 miles.
I ran on the rail trail north of Baltimore, where the running's fine. Went out running conservatively, came back faster (last few miles if I recall were around 6:05, 5:55, 5:45, 5:55, 5:50). Felt good. Rolled past some Falls Store Running club guys who thought they were pretty swell, untill I left them in my dust a la Speedy Gonzalez. I actually got their contact info and may run with them in the future. They seemed like decent guys, and one of them even said Remus calls him every week too.
All in all this was a valiant run, pace averaged around 6:12, with a purposeful hastening of pace on the way back. I was grateful that I tore myself out of bed early and beat some of the heat. The shade of the trail really made a difference on this muy caliente day.
On a side note, I bought 15 Gatorades at the store today. Extraordinary sale! I was like: "Yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..."
Plus: great news! I'm behind in my work! What's the great news? Oh, I just saved over 20% on my car insurance by switching to Geico. Seriously though, the Gecco who dances the robot with greater skillz than Kelly Monaco truly hooked me up.

Chowing down in Colorado. That's what I call high altitude training.

I just brushed my teeth and I'm going to bed, but I'm hungry again

Saturday!, 7.9.05
AM: 49 min, Oh around 7 miles. Ran up above Hopkins undergrad campus. Spent afternoon trying to assemble a dum-dum table from Ikea. It should've been simple, but a few of the holes were drilled incorrectly and I'll have to return the table legs tomorrow for the now-quadripelegic table.
PM: 44 min. Ugh. Really hot out, and I was feeling ever so slow. Ran towards the Inner Harbor, but turned around once I got close to the hordes of baseball fans there for the Orioles vs. Red Sox Clash (Orioles won in front of 4th largest crowd of Camden Yards history). Ran around neighborhoods, found a quicker way to Dru hill park (only about a dozen minutes). This run was a crawl, only call it 6 miles.

Had to get back to go to Baltimore Shakespeare Festival, which I recommend to anyone in the area. Stacy and I shared a picnic prior to watching "The Merry Wives of Windsor", an entertaining, and relatively shallow comedy starring the infamous John Falstaff (famous line alert: the world's mine oyster). By sitting on a blanket, we had priority seating and watched from the front row (within spitting distance of stage). To describe the experience in one word, I'd have to say: supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

Friday 7.8.05
AM: 1 hour. Ravenous, man-eating rains this morning. Very uninspired run, did some loops around neighborhood, park, etc. At least some kid waiting at his busstop was impressed by me, and waved.
PM: 14 min. Well, I always run longer than this, but 2 miles was all I had the time for today. Drove down to Baltimore an hit the roads, and saw Stacy driving down St. Paul St. towards me about a mile out. I raced her home, able to keep up due to the many streetlights. She just barely vanquished, and shamed me.
We went to Stacy's friend's b-day party by the Inner Harbor. Lots of med-school mumbo jumbo talk, but at least there was a cat and a cake involved.

Thursday 7.7.05
Really tired, so slept in and skipped morning run.
70 min in afternoon, out along Radnor Trail. Really hungry .as I ran late and run was a bit of a drag. Felt a lot better after doing 8 X 100+m strides at the end over at Agnes Irwin school.

Wed.
AM: 30 min relaxed morning run.
76 min. Longer run today. Around Willows perchance?

A few fine young fellows.

Shhh... don't tell

My top secret training is now available to the public! I will fill in further details later. My extensive training, kicking weekends, and 2 summer jobs are occupying much of my time, and the blog has suffered. It's bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

7.5.05
AM: 28min, 4 miles, a few easy loops around the local, grassy park.
PM: 18:18 warmup (2.75 mi), 22:18 for 4 mile rolling hill tempo on Radnor trail, 25:34 cooldown (3.75 mi). Saw a tiger cat = good omen. Hot and sticky, I ran following a summer thundershower. I left my shoes to dry during the day out on the shed, and they were soaked. I culminated the day with about 140 pushups in 3 sets. I've done a lot of pushups lately, and workouts with my "I can barely lift them" 20 lb dumbbells. Suddenly, I've become a pushup ninja. I did 75 in a row the other day, a major record. Perhaps ballooning up around 180 lbs made me a man. Don't worry, a few more 100 mile weeks and I'll be 100 mile weak. Like woman.
7.4.05 HAPPY 4th of JULY!
AM: 65 min, 10 miles at a good, healthy pace. Ran around the Willows park trails. Tripped and, for a millisecond looked like superman, before faceplanting on some roots.
PM: 35.5 min, got out for another 5 mi. today around the crappy ankle-breaker park. I hit many plants and cross my fingers it's not poison ivy. So far, so good.
7.3.05
1 hour 40 min, a dandy of a run at Valley Forge. Mt. Joy over to Horseshoe trail (I think). Much cooler in shade, swell to be on trails. Stacy studied in grass as I ran. Saw deer by the bushel. What this park lacks is a few cheetahs to thin out the herd.

Went to Phillies game tonight. Dropped by Geno's on the way in and got authentic Philly Cheesesteaks. Phillies blew the game, but fought a good battle. I suggest that the catcher learn to catch. I knew I was at a Philly event when a big hombre gave double middle-fingers when the "fan cam" highlighted him at the beginning of the game. Pretty funny.
7.2.05
57 min, a good 8+ easy in the morning, found a mini trail in a private neighborhood along Montgomery Rd. Ran prior to heading out to Live 8 in Philly. This megaconcert was a good time, but try as I might, I couldn't see the stage. Only could watch on jumbo-tron screens and of course, listen, which is what it was all about anyway. I unabashedly came for the music and the scene, not the politics. Sure, helping people is good, but people shouldn't let celebrities brainwash them before reviewing all the facts. I got jiggy with it to the extreme maximum.
7.1.05
AM: 35min, 5 miles. Guess who got kicked out of Presbyterian Children's Village Today? (It's me, it's me). I like running around the large campus in my neighborhood (close to a mile around and grassy). Some chump asked me to leave the premises because "there are little girls around." (I think my path may have unwittingly cut by the munchkin's dorms). I politely departed, but I mean come on, WWJD? Kick an innocent runner out of God-town? Unlikely...
PM: 53min (15 min warmup, 2:51 half mile uphill, 3:27 easy half mile, 2:35 quicker half mile, 3:26 easy half mile, 2:36 quicker half mile, 3:31 easy half mile, 5:05 quicker (downhill) mile, 14.5 min cooldown). I wanted to do something to remind my legs what sub-6 pace felt like, but couldn't muster a real workout. This sufficed. One of these days I ran during a thunderstorm, I think it was today. "I ain't afraid of no ghosts"
6.30.05
AM: 35 min, 5 miles
PM: 56 min. 8+ miles? Maybe ran around Bryn Mawr grad college. I've seen a fox on the playing field twice here. I believe it's his home!
6.29.05
AM: 35.5 min, 5 miles.
PM: 81:42 min, really hot day. Ran to Willows. First time on these trails in a while, and I stuck around for a while. Portions felt tropical and appeared as visions from the Amazon--steam rising from little creeks, tiny waterfalls, large plants overgrowing the paths... I also discovered stinging nettle/burnt hazel that ouched like nobody's business.
6.28.05
AM: 35 min, easy 5 miles. Nothing like some cobwebs in the face from AnkleBreaker park to wake you up in the morning!
PM: 18 min warmup,22:10 4 mile hilly tempo on Radnor Trail,14 min cooldown. Really steamy day.
6.27.05
PM: 67 min, 10 miles somewhere.
6.26.05
1 hour 33 min 51 seconds, 15 miles. Super-dooper, I can't believe it's not butter, hot. Drove up to the rail trail north of Baltimore, where the miles are marked. This forces me to press the pace, but this is good once in a while. Gladly, there was a fountain about 7 miles in that I soaked myself in. I was swimming in sweat (as I side note, this creates some brilliant chafage). Anyway, the pace was around 6:15/mile most of the run. The trail is pretty flat, and tow-path like.
6.25.05
64 min, easy 9-9.5 miles around Charm City (up to Dru Hill through Hopkins). Did this run after a long day in DC so I was rather weary. The zoo rocked. Radical gorillas could've entertained me for days. Another favorite event was witnessing the elephants get their daily baths (hot, I must say). Of course, the cheetah kitten unveiling was also momentous. Stacy and I also swung by the Smithsonian, which was having a festival. No kidding, on my run, I saw a midget. I felt like I was back at the zoo. Luckily, I was wearing sunglasses and could stare at him while pretending not to!
6.24.05
PM 55 min, Friday morning run.
6.23.05
AM: 27.5
53 min
6.22.05
74 min
6.21.05
AM 28 min
14 warmup, 22:26 4 mile tempo, 14.5
6.20.05
AM 35 min
47 min
6.19.05
72 min
6.18.05
66 min
6.17.05
49 min
6.16.05
55 min
6.15.05
AM: 37.5 min
29.5 min
6.14.05
58 min
6.13.05
52 min
6.12.05
50 min
6.11.05
42 min
6.10.05
55 min
6.09.05
43 min
6.8.05
33 min
6.7.05
43.5 min
6.6.05
40 min
6.5.05
35.5 min
6.4.05
30
6.3.05
???
6.2.05
29 min